Thursday, May 13, 2010

Really? Work Life Balance

Really? This is my new favorite word to say when I’m dumbfounded, speechless and utterly confused.

That’s exactly what I said, out loud, when I read another mom’s post about her days being super busy and overwhelmed as a stay at home mom and trying to find her work/life balance. Don’t get me wrong, I totally understand that a life of a stay at home mom can be busy and most certainly overwhelming at times.

This is probably the most “controversial” post I’ve ever written, because I know this is a hot topic that seems to divide the seas between working moms and stay at home moms.

But I felt compelled to share my feelings on this topic. I’m going to say it like I see it. I hope I don’t offend anyone because that is not my intention.

I just cannot comprehend how a stay at home mom would feel overwhelmed on a daily basis to the point she’s complaining about not having a work/life balance.

Key words here are work/life balance. I have MANY friends and family that are stay at home moms and I know they can have hectic days. I am not saying that being a stay at home mom is easy. Every day has its own challenge.

I had my “really?” moment when I was reading about this mom’s experience being so busy with her three kids’ activities and how she doesn’t have a work life balance…

First, I would never describe being a stay at home mom was a “job.” Sure it’s hard work. Sure it can take every ounce of my energy to scrub that pot, or change that diaper. But being a mom is your life. There isn’t a work/life balance to even find.

I’ve decided that this particular mom was really trying to explain how hard it is to find time for herself. This is something ALL moms struggle with and I couldn’t agree more.

Second… I am a working mom. I work full time outside the home. And as this blogger, went on and on about her day and all the things she needed to do – laundry, house cleaning, lunch making, shuttling kids etc – I couldn’t help but think: I do all of those things AND I work 40 hours a week away from home.

Let’s be honest here - I would give ANYTHING to be a stay at home mom where my only head aches and stresses where about which play dates to schedule and what school activities I would go to.

I guess another part of my “really?” moment is tied to my own disappointment that I cannot be home with my son. Instead, I have chosen a lifestyle that must be supported by two incomes. I understand this is my choice. But it is not an easy choice by any means.

It pains me to know that I may be missing out on something.

I’ve had my fair share of mother issues. My mom worked full time and I pretty much was what we called back then a “latch key kid” I’d come home from school, I’d let myself in and even start dinner. Sometimes my mom wouldn’t even be home before bed time.

I have made a commitment to myself to be a different kind of working mom then my mother was. I know that I will make extra time to be there for my children.

I know I will struggle with a work/life balance.

A struggle that I am thankful for everyday.

Okay – let me have it! I’d love to know what you all think...

Monday, May 10, 2010

Sunday Morning Play Date

Dominck had a fun morning over at Grammie's playing outside and riding in his little blue push car. Here are a few pictures. And yes, I'm a sun nazi. Hats are required when we're outside. I cna't help it... too many skin scares in my family.

Practicing walking. Those first steps are coming!

Here's Dominick doing "roll it" from patty cake. This is his all time favorite LOOK AT ME move. It's adorable.

Mother's Day at the Mazzarella's

We celebrated mother's day in grand fashion.

We had a bbq on Friday night and Frank made some mouth watering bbq ribs! To die for!!! They were rubbed and smoked and grilled... yum!

Saturday we just took it easy and I guess Dominick got the memo and he slept in until 9 a.m.! I was shocked! The kid went down at 6:30, got a diaper change around 6 a.m. and slept soundly until 9. Of course, I was up after the diaper change and couldn't get back to sleep. I caught up on my shows that I taped throughout the week. I don't have any time during the week to watch TV, so come Saturday, I have 5 or 6 shows to watch.

We had the plumber come and clean out our pipes. We have constantly slow drains and hopefully Joe the plumber, yes our plumber's name is Joe, won't have to come back any time soon. We are thinking about working the laundry room... that's a whole other post.

Back to mother's day. So the day actually arrives. I'm hoping Frank will spring out of bed at the first peep from Dominick so I can sleep in and maybe even enjoy a leisurely breakfast in bed that he slaved over... oh wait... some one slap me because that is far from what happened. Welcome to the life of a cop's wife. Or anyone who's husband works nights. Poor Frank was wiped out and didn't get to sleep until well after 2 a.m. So there I was up and atom with Dominick. Which I really didn't mind at all. I love spending time with Dominick. I hardly get to see him during the week, so I cherish every minute I can. And my breakfast in bed was a delicious dinner on Friday.

That said, it's nice to have break once in a while. Hint hint.

After I pulled Frank out of bed we headed over to his parents house for brunch. Grammie, as we all call her now, had quite a spread of sandwich fixings, salads, and an egg casserole. Who doesn't love a good egg casserole. Dominick ate a bite of everything and really loved sucking on the bread and butter pickles and spitting them right out. This boy eats more than any other kid his age and thankfully he isn’t picky at all. Sure, he’ll spit out the first bite of something new, but it takes him a second to realize, oh, that was good. Then he gobbles it up.

Here are a few pictures from our day.

Here is Dominick cleaning Grammie's table... he's so helpful.

No, you will not put me on this very cool riding toy, I'll push it around, tip it over but I will NOT ride on it!

Dominick is in the "I don't want to sit still for a picture" phase... we're hoping he ages out of this real soon. But if he's anything like his father, it'll last well into his 30's.

Give the boy a cell phone and he's as happy as a clam.

Isn't his outfit cute! I just had to get this shirt when I saw it and he looks adorable in jeans.